A dying gasp, a muttered curse. A frantic plea. A blessing, or a promise of eternal love. Famous last words are often remembered many years after the speaker passes on, so don’t leave your final utterances to fate. Plan ahead! There’s no time like the present to take a moment and pen your own parting thoughts. While you’re at it, feel free to compose a few words for other souls who are dearly (or not so dearly) departed.
Kindly compose some Very Final Thoughts for three people, as follows:

1. A famous (or infamous) living character of your choosing

3. And you, personally — in the brief moments before you shuffle off this mortal coil

Be funny if you like; death can be hilarious. But if you’d like a real challenge, make your concluding thoughts profound, or poignant.

[Samples:]

“Wait a minute…”
~Pope Alexander VI

[In French] “I am about to — or I am going to — die: either expression is correct.”
~Dominique Bouhours, French grammarian

“I have just had eighteen whiskeys in a row. I do believe that is a record.”
~Dylan Thomas

“Is everyone else alright?”
~Robert F. Kennedy, to his wife directly after he was shot

“Love one another.”
~George Harrison, to his family on his death bed while dying from cancer, November 29, 2001.

“Tvert imot!” [Translation: "On the contrary!"]
~Henrik Ibsen, in response to a nurse who told a visitor he was a little better.

“I have not told half of what I saw.”
~Marco Polo

“Now, now, my good man, this is no time for making enemies.”
~Voltaire (attributed), when asked by a priest to renounce Satan

We’ll be accepting entries, in the comments to thread, until August 15, 2008, at which point we’ll sort the wheat from the deadly chaff, and choose five lucky winners who will each receive a US Advanced Reading Copy of The Graveyard Book. Good luck everyone!

Just a quick update to let everyone know that the Subterranean Press edition of The Graveyard Book has passed the 60% sold out mark. We do not anticipate that we will make copies of our edition available to wholesalers or large online retailers.

It wasn’t easy choosing the “winners” from among everyone’s final words, but our crack team of ghouls, goblins, shades, and other denizens of the land beyond have sifted through the entries and come up with the following four winners:

R.I.P.
Our Dear Stacy
1979-2008

Stacy was kind.
She was beautiful and just.
If only she hadn’t
Let her tongue ring rust.

***

Douglas Warren
1967-2012

Holy Crap!
The Mayans Were Right

***

Jim Grayson
1976-2013

It was pitch black.
He was eaten by a grue.

***

Susanne
1765-1838
Here lies Susanne.
Finally.

1845-1880
Here lies Susanne.
Hopefully.

1887-1953
Here lies Sus—
DAMMIT!

1975-2067
Here lie—
ARRRRGH.

2085-2176
This time we used a stake

***

Thanks to everyone who entered. Winners, if you’ll drop us a note at thegraveyardbook@gmail.com and we’ll get your Advance Reading Copies of The Graveyard Book out to you.

Tombstones say so much, so concisely. In that one small dash between a date of birth and a date of death, a whole life has passed with just a few short words to sum up all the living. What will your epitaph say about you? Will you be fondly remembered or gleefully forgotten? Try to imagine what might be chiseled in stone on your behalf, and send us your speculation.

Give us your name, your dates, and no more than 25 words on the subject of your passing. Our favorites will be awarded their own virtual grave and headstone in a specially designed page on TheGraveyardBook.com

Here are a few samples for you…

“That’s All Folks”
~Mel Blanc

***

This stone was raised to Sarah Ford,
Not Sarah’s virtues to record–
For they’re well known to all the town–
No Lord; it was raised to keep her down.
~Sarah Ford
Kilmurry Church, Ireland

***

“Here lies the body
of Jonathan Blake
Stepped on the gas
Instead of the brake”
~Memory of an accident in a Uniontown, Pennsylvania cemetery

***

“As the flowers are all made sweeter by the sunshine and the dew,
So this old world is made brighter by the lives
Of folks like you.”
~American gangster Bonnie Parker (of Bonnie and Clyde)

***

“Alien tears will fill for him
pity’s long-broken ern,
for his mourners will be outcast men,
and outcasts always mourn.”
~Oscar Wilde

***

“Murderd by a traitor and a coward whose
name is not worthy to appear here.”
~Jesse James

***

“Here lays Butch,
We planted him raw.
He was quick on the trigger,
But slow on the draw.”
~In a Silver City, Nevada, cemetery

***

So have at it. Please leave your entries in the comment thread, and on or about July 1, we (along with various ghouls, and the ambulatory dead) will choose the winners and get Advance Reading Copies out to them pronto.

Neil’s British publisher, Bloomsbury, has just gone live with their dedicated Graveyard Book page. Have a look about the place, where you can not only any of the three UK editions, you’ll also find an excerpt from the book. As the site notes, the UK editions will be unshrouded on Halloween.

A Special Offer for Your Final Arrangements
Become a Permanent Member of the Graveyard’s Posthumous Crew

As you may have heard, our graveyard’s newest resident is a living boy with a curious disposition and a tendency to wander. Frankly, it’s a marvel he’s survived this long; but we do our best to keep an eye on him. We confess, it’s something of a full time job.

Would you like to take a turn at watching him? The cemetery may be formally closed to new burials, but for the right sort of soul…exceptions can be made.

Let us persuade you to peek at our registry.

You’ll find this special section bound exclusively in the limited edition of The Graveyard Book from Subterranean Press, noting the names of all the dearly departed spirits who call the graveyard home. These are Bod’s family members and friends–a circle of watchful loved ones who protect him from harm of all the likely (and unlikely) sorts.

We invite you to imagine yourself listed therein.

Eligible shoppers who order this limited edition direct from Subterranean Press will see their names automatically added to our exclusive registry. This is much more than an unprecedented chance to find your name alongside your favorite characters, and a once-in-a-lifetime chance to appear in a Neil Gaiman book–it represents your personal commitment to Bod’s continued safety and well-being.

Everyone needs a final resting place eventually. Why not come home to Bod, and the Owens, and the rest of our graveyard family? The company is exceptional and the accommodations are superb. We promise, you’ll like what you see.

So come spend eternity buried in your favorite book. Quantities are limited and space is going fast, but prime locations are still available. Could we interest you in a plot? A cremation niche? A crypt? How about a lovely columned mausoleum, festooned with statuary?

Your afterlife is much too important to leave to chance, and this is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity at immortality. Won’t you take advantage of it?

The Graveyard Book will be available later this year in two unique editions:

Limited: 500 signed numbered copies: $250
Lettered: 26 signed deluxe bound copies, housed in a custom traycase, with a Dave McKean remarque: $900

We’ve just heard from Dave McKean, who’s hard at work on the Special Signed Limited Edition coming from SubPress. He tells us to expect the following features exclusive to that edition:

– New and very different design from the Harpers and Bloomsbury editions;
– New illustrations (probably 4 or 5);
– New photographic sections adding atmosphere under the title pages at the beginning, and under the Interlude chapter;
– Use of two colour and duotone throughout;
– Full colour section at the end, with alternate covers, roughs and sketches.

Head over to the SubPress site to order the Signed Limited Edition